T's Former House of 'Cam

RIP This Blog (January-May 2005)

2005-05-31T16:00:00.000+10:00

Due to the aforementioned decrease in exclusively Neurocam-related posts - partly due to my promotion, partly due to the sad decline of the Neuroblogging scene in general over recent months, partly due to the different blogging style that I've developed since initiating my other, more general-purpose blog at the end of March - I've decided to officially mothball this site.

I will continue to post about the 'Cam from time to time on aforementioned other blog. That address again is http://teigan.typepad.com. Those with links/bookmarks, please update etc.

Thank you.

Last Ever Neurocam Post?

2005-05-26T11:30:00.000+10:00

Well, probably not. But the second half of my induction was completed earlier in the week and I really can't say anything at all about it, except that it's pretty sweet. I certainly ain't disappointed.

Hang in there, you little entry-level scamps.

As others have observed, the more you learn about the Cam the harder it becomes to talk about. But I will continue to blog about Neurocam to the extent that this is feasible. May not be all that much.

That said I have a new assignment, NIO-3001/01, which is not of itself earth-shattering in nature, and which I am not explicitly enjoined from discussing. Suffice to say it's a less diversionary equivalent of NCI-2332.

Xul Is Dead

2005-05-17T15:25:00.000+10:00

Long live Xul.

Assignment MIA-0009/5 (Part 2)

2005-05-16T23:30:00.000+10:00

So, at approximately 7:50 this evening, a white stretch limo pulled up outside the Belgian Beer Cafe on Moubray Street, Prahran, where two other operatives (one blogging, one not) and myself were waiting as instructed.

The driver ushered us inside. Two masked, silent Neurocam personnel sat at either end of a long seat facing a bar. The limo pulled out and we were each handed several documents (including two copies of a hefty engagement contract), a pen, and a set of headphones.

A laptop (one of those adorable baby powerbooks) had been placed on the bar, and instructions were delivered to us through it by way of a video address by a masked woman. Once she had finished speaking, an onscreen timer counted down the ten minutes we were given in which to examine the documents and complete certain tasks pertaining to them, which we did before being returned to our departure point.

Upon alighting from the limo we were each presented with an enigmatic souvenir.

We then proceeded into the Belgian Beer Cafe and had a drink.

Assignment MIA-0009/05

2005-05-16T11:25:00.000+10:00

This long-awaited missive landed in my inbox on Thusday:

From: operations@neurocam.com
Subject: Neurocam Assignment – Monday May 16th 2005
Date: 12 May 2005 8:30:35 PM

Dear Operative [Teigan]

Please be aware that due to availability constraints you are requested to be available for an assignment relating to your offer of promotion on Monday May 16th between 7:30 and 8:30pm. This schedule is now compulsory, and any deviation will result in the retraction of your promotion offer and potential dismissal from Neurocam International.

The exact timing and location and other operational requirements will be provided via the usual email communication during the day in question. Please advise immediately if this will be a problem for you. I can say, however, that the intended location you will need to travel to will be in the vicinity of [where I live].

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Neurocam International

As advised, that was followed this morning by this:

From: operations@neurocam.com
Subject: Neurocam International Assignment MIA – 0009/05
Date: 16 May 2005 10:06:04 AM

Dear Operative [Teigan]

This evening, Monday May 16, 2005, at 7:45 pm precisely, you are to be at the following location: [public location in the inner south of Melbourne]

Be wearing your Neurocam Identifier if it is in operational condition. If it is not in operational condition you must display evidence of your Neurocam membership.

Your attendance is compulsory and you must come alone. Any deviation will result in the retraction of your promotion offer and potential dismissal from Neurocam International.

Regarding operational security: you are permitted to publicly note the purpose of the assignment, and it impact on you as an operative of Neurocam International, and describe the events involved in the assignment, but you are not permitted to reveal the details of any messages, conversations, documents, reports, or other communications beyond the two preparatory assignment arrangement emails.

I trust you will understand and abide by the intent of these security requirements. Further security guidelines will be provided as required and relevant to the issues and eventualities arising out of this evening’s assignment.

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Neurocam International

The Troops Are Getting Restless

2005-05-13T08:30:00.000+10:00

Dissatisfaction abroad in the Neuroranks: Jo rants, Lady J agrees (as does Simon Blackmoore), Li flakes out, and Reanimator drops the bomb.

R's articulate points aside I wonder how much all of this really has to do with the 'Cam itself, and how much of it is down to frustration at all the timewasting, bandwagon-hijacking idiots who seem to have gravitated towards it over the last little while.

Assignment NTC-5555/01 Completed

2005-05-10T18:30:00.000+10:00

Fischer in LA (part 2) & The Matrix @ The Astor

2005-05-09T22:30:00.000+10:00

Mail from Madeline Khan:

I hereby confirm that Ms. Bridget Fischer is currently traveling abroad and that the west coast of the United States of America is one of her many intended destinations. Furthermore, I can confirm that I am the author of the email recently reproduced upon Operative Midnight’s web journal.

Also, Melbournites: The Matrix is screening at the Astor in St Kilda tomorrow night. Never seen it in a cinema before. Bit exciting. I'm certainly not the only Cammer who's a fan of this movie; anyone else thinking of going?

I'll be wearing my identifier..

aaatch.. Avery, Xul & Urik; Fischer in LA; Moncrief Full Of Shit: Zelle; Vale Aliask and Assignment 5555/01 ..hoo!!

2005-05-08T21:00:00.000+10:00

Been very slack on the bloggage front of late; touch of flu and not much worth reporting. Apologies.

Everything looks exceptionally hazy in Camland at present. The Neurowiki (Wikicam?) appears to be coming along nicely but if its objective is to serve as a source for accurate info, I kind of wonder if it isn't a doomed project. As is the case more often than not, the line between fact and fiction's so blurry right now that the distinction seems almost irrelevant.

Avery's supposedly arrived here in Melbourne. But with his previous post he seems to have warped into the Xulosphere. (Hi Avery, if you're reading this and you really are in town. Feel free to invalidate my skepticism.)

Meanwhile I - and presumably others - have received a mail purportedly from Xul's associate Urik, advising that Mr. Solar has gone into hiding and ceased all internet communications, although he remains "in excellent physical and mental health". Which is reassuring.

I've lodged an enquiry regarding Midnight's claims about Fischer's trip to LA. His latest entry, quoting a mail from Madeline Khan, suggests that there is genuinely something going down there, even if it is just more smoke and, y'know, mirrors.

Gertrude Zelle has told tobyesterhase aka Operative Cronin that Marc Moncrief's legendary Age article, responsible for introducing many a Melbourne operative (including this one) to the 'Cam, is "a potentially slanderous fiction, complied by him from half-truths, materials of questionable veracity and blatant lies." Cronin intends to contact Moncrief about this accusation, which might prove interesting.

In other news, one of my local neuroblogging contemporaries, Aliask (Perception Assessment class of January 3rd - here's his, here's a mine.. ah, the good old days etc) has retired; apparently he couldn't be arsed with Assignment 5555/01, and I don't think he's the only one.

But, good little operative that I am, I faithfully completed the bulk of mine on Friday; hopefully I'll be able to finish it off on Tuesday.

NeuroWiki

2005-05-03T13:00:00.000+10:00

Neuroboardie Dev has set up a Neurocam wiki. If enough people get on board this could grow into an excellent resource.

No Man Is Just A Number (Supposedly)

2005-05-02T11:00:00.000+10:00

It's all about The Prisoner, apparently.

Not seen it myself but the premise sounds intruiging.

Neville Harris Resigns

2005-04-29T18:00:00.000+10:00

From our glorious leader:

Attention all staff and operatives.

Earlier today Mr. Neville Harris, head of Neurocam International’s Administration Division, tendered his resignation due to personal reasons. This resignation will be effective as of close of business today (Friday, April 28, 2005).

I would like to take this opportunity to thank Mr. Harris for his 6 years of loyal service to Neurocam International and I hereby wish Mr. Harris all the best with his future endeavors.

Due to Mr. Harris resignation, however, the position of Administrator has been deemed redundant and a new position has been created to address many of the issues previously dealt with by Mr. Harris.

Mr. Miles Carrefour has been awarded the position of “Induction Officer” within the Human Resources Security Division and will now handle many of the tasks previously assigned to Mr. Harris.

Mr. Harris’ e-mail address will remain active for fourteen days and all correspondence from it will be forward directly to Mr. Miles Carrefour (miles.carrefour@neurocam.com). After this two week period, Mr. Harris’ email account will be deleted from our system.

Regards,

Bridget Fischer
Chief Executive Officer
Neurocam International

It seems likely that this resignation was precipitated by Harris's accidental circulation to all operatives and staff earlier today of a mail intended only for Neurocam management.

Visit My Other Blog, Fucktards

2005-04-29T10:55:00.000+10:00

Sorry.

I just really wanted to use the word "fucktards".

That is all.

Cardoza To Visit Auckland; 'Cam Community Baffled

2005-04-28T19:35:00.000+10:00

It's old news now but still worth a post: Avery "The New Number 2" Cardoza (no, I don't know either) is intent on following the Neurotrail all the way to New Zealand. And "points thereafter".

Good luck, Avery. Whatever the hell you're doing.

Assignment NTC-5555/01

2005-04-26T21:15:00.000+10:00

Received today. Who else?

Miles Carrefour

2005-04-26T08:30:00.000+10:00

They just keep on coming - Simon Blackmoore reports yet another new Neurocam rep: Miles Carrefour, Induction Officer, Human Resources Security Division. Apparently handling new applications.

Google doesn't know anything about him, but I'm sure I've heard this name before somewhere.

Erratum

2005-04-24T09:30:00.000+10:00

Fischer's assistant is Madeline Khan, not Kahn.

(Almost) Everybody Hates Gertrude Zelle

2005-04-22T13:10:00.000+10:00

Known blogging operatives who have reported receiving bitchy email responses from Gertrude Zelle: Another Operative; Elmo; Gigabane; tobyesterhase; Roger That and Exodus (although he was probably asking for it).

Reanimator reports contact with another previously unknown Neurocam staffer - Bridget Fischer's assistant, Madeline Kahn (presumably not this Madeline Kahn, who is dead).

Toasts, Assing, Etc

2005-04-21T15:00:00.000+10:00

Toasts to Maxwell:

Lady J toasting me toasting Li toasting Midnight toasting Constance, Avery & Lady J toasting Maxwell.

Gigabane toasting Cheshire Cat toasting Tobyesterhase toasting me toasting Li toasting Midnight toasting Constance, Avery & Lady J toasting Maxwell

In late February there were some murmurings about schisms & double-crossage in the upper Neuroranks from Jojo & Tript, amongst other sources. In serialising the background to his recent dismissal, Avery seems to be throwing more light on these rumours, and it's shaping up as quite the expose.

Bridge & Charlie- who'd a thunk it?

And we have another neweuroblogger: Simon Blackmoore.

Two New Operative Blogs & Gertie Zelle

2005-04-20T14:20:00.000+10:00

Two new operative blogs: American Guy of Melbourne and Gigabane of Newfoundland, Canada.

New acting Human Resources Security head Gertrude Zelle is not winning too many friends amongst the rank & file. Although it seems she has an unlikely fan in the Maxwell-besotted Constance.

Cardoza Axed

2005-04-19T10:30:00.000+10:00

Respected NYC operative Avery Cardoza has been unceremoniously dumped. Avery - who'll hopefully continue to blog in some form - has now provided a bit of eyebrow-raising background to his Neurodismissal.

Seems Cardoza Investigations was assisting former Human Resources Security head Maxwell Knight with some kind of internal sleuthing exercise. Avery quotes a mail to him from Maxwell dated April 16th:

Regarding the fruits of my investigation, I will contact you with the results following my meeting with senior management of Monday April 18, 2005. I do, however, have high hopes of unmasking the Judas who lurks within our midst.

It was presumably at this meeting that Maxwell 'resigned'.

Hmmmmmm...

UPDATE: Conchis is back online, admitting that his blogjacking by Circle De Luce was a hoax designed to test the integrity of the Cam's Jack Sampson. He offers some possible insight into Maxgate.

Gertrude Zelle Is The New Maxwell Knight

2005-04-18T12:00:00.000+10:00

Another new addition to the official Neuroranks: Gertrude Zelle.

From: Bridget Fischer
To: All Neurocam Staff
Subject: ALL STAFF NOTIFICATION. RE: Maxwell Knight.
Date: 18 April 2005 11:09:47 AM

Attention all staff and operatives.

Earlier today Mr. Maxwell Knight, head of Neurocam’s Human Resources Security Division, tendered his resignation due to personal reasons. This resignation will be effective as of close of business today (Monday, April 18 2005).

I would like to take this opportunity to thank Mr. Knight for his 17 years of loyal service to Neurocam International. His presence in the office has always been a reassuring factor for me and he has brought a highly appreciated debonair flair to the office environment. His contribution to the day-to-day operations of the organization was immense and he will be sorely missed.

I hereby wish Mr. Knight all the best with his future endeavors.

Until such time as the position is advertised internally, Ms. Gertrude Zelle, former assistant to Mr. Knight, will fill the position of Head of the Human Resources Security Division. Please direct any Human Resources Security queries directly to Ms. Zelle at (gertrude.zelle@neurocam.com).

Mr. Knight’s e-mail address will remain active for fourteen days and all correspondence from it will be forward directly to Ms. Zelle. After this two week period, Mr. Knight’s e-mail account will be deleted from our system.

Regards,

Bridget Fischer
Chief Executive Officer
Neurocam International

Conchis Sabotaged (Again)

2005-04-18T00:09:00.000+10:00

Dan Pritchard's blog has ostensibly been 0wn3d by the Circle De Luce. Cheshire Cat has more.

Jack Samson & Otti Votavova

2005-04-17T20:00:00.000+10:00

Constance has been corresponding with two official Neurocam people who aren't Hastings, Fischer, Knight or Harris: "Otti Votavova", via the operations address generally used by Charles, and "Jack Sampson", via Maxwell's address.

Jack Sampson was the primary Neurocam contact of somewhat suspect London operative Conchis aka Dan Pritchard.

Pritchard has contacted her about this.

Ask Not What Neurocam Can Do For You...

2005-04-14T11:00:00.000+10:00

The official Neurocam application has changed - now aspiring operatives have to submit "between 250 and 300 words on what [they] have to offer Neurocam".

Neuroblog Roundup

2005-04-14T10:00:00.000+10:00

If Xade's to be believed, Quilly and Operative Ice (whose blogs have both gone down) are one and the same - and they've been given the Neuro-axe.

Tobyesterhase continues to put the tough questions to Maxwell Knight.

And it turns out his fellow Buffalo, NY operative Bob the Mediocre has a blog after all.

Operative Reanimator & NYC Group Assignment

2005-04-13T08:20:00.000+10:00

Operative Reanimator of the l337 chess sk11z has a a blog. With pictures.

And Constance has (some) news of the group assignment in New York City tomorrow.

Assignment NTC-5781/01 Postmortemage

2005-04-09T17:20:00.000+10:00

Jojo's posted the assignment and an account, Tript has a nice photo of himself along with a few well-chosen words, and Wednesday night attendee (and new blogger) Melbourne Wintermute (as distinct from German Wintermute) has posted his report.

I went on Tuesday. I beat Li, got thrashed like everyone else by Operative Reanimator, and got half a game in with Jojo before 10pm rolled around. I chatted to Tript about John Wayne Gacy's horrible painting, and had encounters with a few other ops as well. It was simultaneously more convivial than the Bolte assignment, and also more intense. I liked it.

Assignment NTC-6421/02 Regretfully Declined

2005-04-07T21:40:00.000+10:00

Well, I submitted my report on Assignment NTC-5781/01 this morning and have already received another, Assignment NTC-6421/02. Unfortunately I've had to knock it back for won't-be-in-town-this-weekend reasons.

You're Funny, Neurocam

2005-04-06T00:35:00.000+10:00

In both senses. Thank you for a weird but enchanting evening.

I still don't understand, but I think I love you.

Anyone game for some kind of extracamricular get together at some point? Tahiti at the end of the year seems too far away.

Assignment NTC-5781/01

2005-04-03T20:10:00.000+10:00

Charlie loves me after all.

To: Neurocam Operations Division
From: Teigan
Date: 2 April 2005 8:07:37 PM

Charles -

Am I correct in assuming that, despite advising of my availability on the 5th and 6th of April as requested, I have not been chosen to participate in the associated assignment, as advertised at http://ex0.blogspot.com/2005/03/did-you-get-yours.html?

Operative Teigan

To: Teigan
From: Neurocam Operations Division
Date: 3 April 2005 12:04:36 PM

Dear Operative Teigan

Our records show that you have indeed been selected for this assignment. Perhaps it was filtered by your email package? Can you please confirm receipt of this email.

Here it is again:

[snip]

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Neurocam International

Hmph

2005-04-02T19:50:00.000+10:00

Got this? Yes.
Get this? No.

Consarn it.

Neurocam Unveiled!

2005-04-01T17:30:00.000+10:00

Massively explosive revelations at Chez Tript, exposing at long last the true purpose and origins of Neurocam.

!!!

Some cynics have suggested the post's got something to do with today's date, but pay no mind - they're just jealous they didn't ~~think of~~ uncover it first.

Xulology, Buffalo Operatives & Forthcoming Melbourne Assignment

2005-03-30T23:20:00.000+10:00

The Xul Solar 23 phenomenon continues to gather momentum, with a new blog by a Professor Anja Farber, Xulism, dedicated to investigating the shadowy spectre that is Solar.

Joining Roger That, tobyesterhase and apparently non-blogging Neuroboard patron Bob the Mediocre, is a fourth new operative in Buffalo, New York: Mr. Urfe.

And the all-seeing Jojo has a scoop about the next Melbourne group assignment.

All Change

2005-03-30T02:00:00.004+10:00

New title, new personal blog. Gonna keep this one going for the moment at least, but after this entry I'll be double-posting everything to the other as well, so why not read that instead? It won't be continuing in quite as tediously self-indulgent and angsty a vein as it's begun. (At least, not as angsty. Self-indulgent, maybe. It's a personal weblog. Deal.)

No word yet from Operations regarding last week's availability call for next week. I'd hate to think I procured that mask for nothing..

Cheshire Cat, Elmo & Beck

2005-03-27T12:50:00.000+10:00

Another UK operative: Cheshire Cat. This one seems entirely genuine.

How many Neurocam operatives are there? What is the true scale of Neurocam's operations? I thought I'd just about gotten a handle on it. It still seems clear they're Melbourne based. But it also seems increasingly evident that there's quite a lot more activity going on out there than just what's reported by the smallish circle of bloggers and Neuroboard posters I'm familiar with. Or is all this just smoke and mirrors?

It's all just smoke and mirrors anyway.

Elmo's been on a posting (and self-portraiture) binge.

And in other, disillusioning, not-Cam-related news, it seems the rumours are true: Beck really is a Scientologist.

Does this mean I can't like him anymore?

Another Mail From Unconchis

2005-03-25T22:00:00.000+11:00

He writes:

Rest assured that Neurocam activity in London is quite extensive and i'm not the only one. A few months ago I was paired up with another operative who had done much of the same stuff as me... The blog entries will be up soon.

Living la vida Solar. Heh. Is he, though? I'm really not sure.

Happy Easter, Everyone

2005-03-25T14:00:00.000+11:00

You are the Fool card. The Fool fearlessly begins the journey into the unknown. To do this, he does not regard the world he knows as firm and fixed. He has a seemingly reckless disregard for obstacles. In the Ryder-Waite deck, he is seen stepping off a cliff with his gaze on the sky, and a rainbow is there to catch him. In order to explore and expand, one must disregard convention and conformity. Those in the throes of convention look at the unconventional, non-conformist personality and think "What a fool". They lack the point of view to understand The Fool's actions. But The Fool has roots in tradition as one who is closest to the spirit world. In many tribal cultures, those born with strange and unusual character traits were held in awe. Shamans were people who could see visions and go on journeys that we now label hallucinations and schizophrenia. Those with physical differences had experience and knowledge that the average person could not understand. The Fool is God. The number of the card is zero, which when drawn is a perfect circle. This circle represents both emptiness and infinity. The Fool is not shackled by mountains and valleys or by his physical body. He does not accept the appearance of cliff and air as being distinct or real.

(Image from Mary DeLave)

Which Tarot Card Are You?
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Unconchis Awakes

2005-03-25T11:45:00.000+11:00

Exactly a month ago, I posted about this blog, discovered via the notorious Q. An engaging read, but its contents seemed a bit too colourful and geographically remote to be plausible, and it hadn't been updated since November.

I mailed its London-based proprietor, Dan Pritchard aka Conchis, but heard nothing back and took this as confirmation that he was indeed a fictionsuit, a conclusion also reached by Graham amongst others.

But although he may yet turn out to be another Xul Solar, it appears that Dan does exist at least in some form, because today he responded to my mail and has also updated. He claims to have made posts since November, which mysteriously vanished whilst he was away in Germany.

Fortitude

2005-03-24T13:10:00.000+11:00

In a comment at Lady J's a certain "RH" has linked to a list of participants in "Marseilles en Juin" which was "a contemporary live art event as well as a meeting between 30 European artists" that took place in 1998.

Jason Maling was one of those participants, facilitating several games of "Fortitude".

Q has linked to Maling's own Fortitude page.

It seems some games are coming up in Melbourne very soon.

Update: Li, bless his socks, has drawn my attention to the fact that the first of the two training days advertised at the official Fortitude site occurred last Sunday, which is interesting.

Group Assignment in NYC & Maxwell On Neurocam's Income Sources

2005-03-24T09:45:00.000+11:00

At least three New York City operatives (Constance, Avery, and supposedly Gothic) have received an availability call for the 14th of April. As far as I know, this will be the first group assignment to take place outside Melbourne.

Maxwell has answered a number of tobyesterhase's queries including one about Neurocam's revenue streams:

Neurocam has a wide range of income sources which include (but are not limited to) investment portfolios, government contracts, negative gearing, private enterprises, joint-venture opportunities, monetary time-share arrangements and wealthy benefactors who currently wish to remain anonymous.

Another Availability Call, Codes & Pynchon Is The New Fowles

2005-03-23T00:55:00.000+11:00

New availability call from Charles today - see Tript. Also received by Aliask (not available), Li, Xade & Jojo, Ice and Random Voodoo (not available).

I'll be available in the evenings and have advised as such. No reply as yet.

Coded messages are turning up everywhere: Xade's posted this snippet ("ulWdKBiblByclxGbpV2cyFWT") in the comments of a post on his own blog, apparently pertaining to last Sunday's assignment. A coded public exchange is taking place between Beltaine and someone purporting to be Iocus Severus. And Aliask has received a strange message as well.

Several recent recruits including Roger That, tobyesterhase and Beltaine have been given an assignment which has something to do with "The Crying of Lot 49" by Thomas Pynchon. Beltaine's remarks indicate this is a similar assignment to the "Magus"-related Assignment NCI-2332/01 of late January/early February. Aliask (again) has also been getting some "Lot 49" action, but in a different context.

Assignment NTC-6421/01 (part 3) (+ d.b.a. Demystified Kinda Sorta)

2005-03-21T12:15:00.001+11:00

So Xade was there, Jojo was there and Li would have been there, had he not been unexpectedly detained unblocking a toilet.

He writes:

I trust, Xade, that you'll be filling us in when the cone of silence has been lifted. There is no reason to be coy, let it all out.

Indeed.

Seems "d.b.a." refers to a pair of drinking establishments - with webcams, which Cardoza has linked to, as well as posting this pic. We may never know the whole story...

The Mysterious Assignment NTC-6421/01 or Another Loop I'm Out Of

2005-03-19T20:30:00.000+11:00

Best wishes to those Melbourne operatives participating in Assignment NTC-6421/01 tomorrow, whatever it is, and whoever you are.

I'm aware of three 'Cammers who confirmed, on request, that they'd be available. Two were subsequently informed they were surplus to requirements. And the other is sayin' nowt.

d.b.a.

2005-03-18T22:40:00.000+11:00

w.t.f. ?

A day too late for it to be an obscure Paddy's Day tradition.

Somebody enlighten me.

Assignment NTC-6421/01, etc

2005-03-17T00:20:00.000+11:00

Availability call from Charles for this Sunday. Also received by Random Voodoo.

I have to work, alas.

Note the novel assignment code prefix "NTC". I'd assumed the "NCI" on previous assignment codes stood for "Neurocam International", but perhaps not.

In what may be a related development, it seems they're not Neurocam "International" any more.

Operative Aliask is not dead. But he hasn't successfully retrieved his new identifier yet, either. Charles has assured him that Neurocam does not require him to die, but this could be an attempt to lull the Kmeister into a false sense of security..

Assignment NCI-7061/01 (Part 5 - An Alternative View)

2005-03-15T12:15:00.000+11:00

As spotted by KNoC, a commenter at Lady J's: some of the fishermen at Bolte Bridge have posted their impressions of Assignment NCI-7061/01 to the "Breammaster" forums:

Mate that was a scary bunch of freaks. I think they were the blokes that the "nerds" used to pick on at school. Definte "Cult Fodder".

Cheers guys. Keep on mastering that bream.

Mask

2005-03-14T20:15:00.000+11:00

I've got one. Thanks to the Wintermute who is not the German Wintermute.
Bring it on, Chuck.

I had a second Neurocam dream last night. It was a good 'un; best dream I've had in ages. Felt quite inspired. It was as dark as the last one but very different in tone. Much less theatrical/cinematic; more conceptual and with more of a linear narrative. It had a lot more meat on it. It was about me and a friend following a trail of enigmatic and frequently misleading clues left by the 'Cam and various other rival and affiliated parties. Our expectations were constantly being subverted. It was all very formal and gamelike. Strong covert surveillance element. Lots of tape recordings. Several people were murdered. As with the last one there was a big de Sade influence, and an all-pervasive aura of distrust and of people as chimeras with no fixed identity. There was a subtle supernatural element, but this was so understated as to be almost imperceptible. It was well spooky.

Once again I'm kicking myself for not writing about it earlier.

Assorted Old News

2005-03-09T18:20:00.000+11:00

I feel like the red queen this week; in all areas I seem to be running as fast as I can to stay in the same place. Hopefully it'll pass.

Much ado in the neuroblogosphere:

Official Man On The Outside Q aka Quilly has retired his blog, leaving us only with a latin epithet which translates to "Who will guard the guardians?" and a curious photo of a masked man in a bar, clutching a beer in one hand and an unidentified young lady in the other.

Xul Solar is under siege.

Some joker has apparently been impersonating Robin Hely both in Xul's comments and in a mail sent to Avery Cardoza, amongst others.

Aliask lost his Neurocam identifier and now HE'S GOING TO DIE (possibly).

Xade points out that many of the images seen in the "Traverse" trailer have previously appeared in the "Neurocam Exposed" video files sent anonymously to Tript last year, giving us a pretty good indicator of their source.

The link to the trailer on the index page of robinhely.com has gone down, incidentally. Now we have grey, and yet another enigmatic six-digit number.

Hely told me the ones in the page titles are down to "some anomaly created by Dreamweaver" (presumably he meant this Dreamweaver, not that Dreamweaver). I only looked incredulous for a moment, in case he was spying on me.

Hot Mask Tips; A Trailer For "Traverse"; and Iocus Severus on Burke, Maling & Hely

2005-03-07T20:45:00.000+11:00

Firstly - an anonymous poster has provided two helpful mask leads in a comment on the preceeding post.

Secondly - following the promotional image which appeared on his site about two weeks ago, Robin Hely's posted a trailer for his improbable movie "Traverse". You'll probably need to append the suffix ".mp4" to the filename before it'll play.

Thirdly, and most interestingly - LJ has posted a substantial communique from Iocus Severus about Peter Burke, Jason Maling and Robin Hely, and their connections to Neurocam.

According to Iocus: "Both Jason Maling and Peter Burke seem genuinely bewildered by the Neurocam phenomenon." Hely, meanwhile, comes in for quite a nasty serve - Iocus concurs with Hely's claim that he's a former NC operative, but describes him as "pathological", at least in his tendency to talk up his involvement: "It is quite apparent that those who know him indulge his fantasies of senior operative status in Neurocam, simply to keep the peace."

The Dust Has Settled..

2005-03-06T00:30:00.000+11:00

..in the wake of Assignment NCI-7061/01, at least round these parts.

But unanswered questions linger: Why did Hastings suggest to at least one operative that I took the famous surveillance clip? Who did? Operative Bunny? Were some ops, as has been suggested, specifically assigned to capture certain encounters? Charlie, whilst most curteously responding to my queries, remains tight-lipped.

On a more practical level, myself and a number of other ops remain frustrated in our attempts to procure kabuki masks (although El Jmeister has been good enough to research some alternative possibilitites).

Fascinating rumours of internal ructions continue to swirl mysteriously.

And what on Earth has the Sydney Shemyaza (as distinct from the Melbourne-based Operative Shemjaza) been up to? As Operative Gagblat comments: "Somewhere in Melbourne? Intruige? Finances? Homicide squad? 9002-01? WTF?"

I Had My First Neurodream Last Night

2005-03-02T14:30:00.000+11:00

Surprising I haven't had one until now, really.

Sadly it's already all fading away but it was a big, complex epic thing with endless confusions and revelations and double-crossings, mostly to do with people turning out to be other people. It was equal parts Citizen Kane, The Third Man and The Matrix. Fight Club was in there too, and The Magus, naturally. Robert Henley loomed large over the proceedings, Harry Lime-like, although he never actually appeared until the end (see below).

Harris, Knight, Hastings & Fischer appeared as this single, endlessly morphing identity, possibly of alien origin. Iocus Severus was in there. Xade & Jojo might have been Iocus, although this was never clear. Robin Hely kept popping up and helpfully editorialising everything (often via phonecalls), although in the end his contributions were revealed to be entirely misleading, driven by an agenda so evil no one could bring themselves to say what it was.

Lady J was also a shadowy and slightly sinister prescence. She seemed basically benevolent and was never really linked in to anything - but this might have been because she was just way too clever.

The closing scene was the one from Salo, with the libertines watching the captives (who were all figures from the Neuroblogosphere) torture & kill each other in a courtyard (which was also North Wharf) through binoculars from various vantage points. The libertines were Xul Solar & Methodius (who might or might not have been Robin Hely), Iocus, and the Charles/Neville/Maxwell/Bridget entity.

The punchline was that *I* turned out to be Robert Henley, although I hadn't realised it, because I'd erased my own memories, Total Recall-style.

It was the most haunting thing. I wish I'd had time first thing this morning to write it all down when it was still fresh in my memory. I'm sure my subconscious is much making better sense of all the current goings-on than my rational, analytical mind, which is getting horribly confused.

Assignment NCI-7061/01 (Part 4 - My Report)

2005-03-01T10:30:00.000+11:00

Here is a lightly edited version of the report I submitted to Neuro-Operations on Friday:

I arrived on foot at the end of North Wharf slightly early at approximately 4:45pm.

Approaching the area designated in the assignment briefing, I saw a handful of people obviously fishing, and also a lone male figure seated on a bench at the left hand side of the wharf, staring out across the water, who I imagined was probably another operative. He seemed very self-contained and I didn't approach him, but instead went to the end of the wharf and surveyed the area beyond it.

Before very long a car pulled up and a portly guy, probably in his late twenties, emerged from it and started looking around. I caught his eye and we approached each other, noting each other's Neurocam identifiers as we drew closer. We introduced ourselves, both producing pens and notepads (his an A4 lecture pad, mine a little pocket notebook) to write down each others' names, with some mutual amusement at the strangeness of the situation.

He identified himself as Shemjaza or 'Shem'. Being aware of a blog maintained by a Sydney-based operative using the handle Shemyaza, I told him "I thought you lived in Sydney". He was a bit taken aback by this, claiming that he lived in Melbourne and that the blog wasn't his.

We talked a bit about about the assignment and characteristics of the location, including the people currently present at the scene. We decided to indirectly approach the young man sitting on the bench and see how he reacted.

His response to our approach was consistent with that of someone expecting to meet strangers, and once we'd exchanged cursory greetings, he produced his identifier badge from his pocket. We then introduced ourselves; he gave his name as Roger. He was probably in his late teens.

We discussed peoples' potential willingness to get their feet wet. Shem & I noted that we had both come prepared in old, unvalued footwear.

At 5pm another operative arrived on foot, a young guy in a bright orange t-shirt who approached us with little hesitation. He introduced himself as Colin. Shem & I both got out our notebooks again.

We continued to talk about the assignment; what the two items were likely to be, how many people we thought would show up, etc.

The next operative to arrive was a sturdy middle-aged man who gave his name as "04", followed shortly after by an older woman called "Arachni" ("as in spiders"), who, following initial introductions, sat down on the bench and lit up a pipe.

Next was a diminutive middle-aged man named "American Guy". Then a man in his twenties who arrived on a motorbike and introduced himself as "Wintermute" (again - there is a blogging operative purportedly located in Germany who goes by the name Wintermute, but this was pretty self-evidently a different Wintermute). Next, a woman in her twenties or early thirties called "Bunny".

(By this point, Shemjaza had fallen into the role of nametaker, and as such had become a focal point for the group. Since I was still standing next to him, and also taking notes - apparently we were the only ones doing this - whilst those who'd arrived subsequently were gathered around us in a vague semicircle, I felt a bit like the deputy sheriff, although I didn't take any kind of leadership role in subsequent proceedings. 'Shem', on the other hand, sustained a vague leadership role throughout the operation.)

Next to arrive was Jonathan, who I recognised as the fresh-faced AppleCentre retail rep from Moonie Ponds who'd started a short-lived Neuroblog earlier in the year.

Shortly after that a guy probably in his early twenties called Xade - another familiar name - accompanied by a woman of similar age who announced herself as Johanna initially, later defaulting to JoJo,

A large group arrived next. At Shemjaza's request, they announced their names: "MK Ultra" (male, in his 20s-30s?), "Benjamin" (male, teens), Tosh (male, unsure), "Plasmo" (female, teens or early 20s), "Dubya" (male, teens or early 20s), "Fraggle" (male, 50s), "Tillops" (male, unsure), "BishBash" (unsure), and "Binkus" (unsure).

They were followed by "Fleegle" (female, 20s?).

At approximately 5:10pm, Shemjaza asked for a show of hands: who was willing to get their feet wet? Maybe ten or so people were. He proposed that those operatives explore the area beyond the edge of the wharf - i.e. the rocks leading down to the water, and around the pillars under the bridge - whilst everyone else covered the remaining area. A vague consensus was reached that anyone who found anything interesting should yell out, and that if no one was able to find anything after 20 minutes or so, we should reassemble at the bench to restrategise.

Whilst these arrangements were being discussed, two more ops arrived, "Nathan" (male, teens or early 20s) and "AliasK" (male, teens), the latter another op with whom I was familiar from the blogosphere. [Note: Nathan, who has since changed his operative ID, is known online as Random Voodoo.]

I opted to start off searching the rocks leading down to the water. I scrutinised many plastic bottles and peered into many nooks and crannies. I pulled a red plastic chair out of the water, but it was revealed to be just a red plastic chair.

I moved down towards the bridge pillars and joined the group investigating that area.

At around 5:20pm we heard shouts from the surface of the wharf. A group had assembled around an area on its right hand edge, facing the river.

Operative Nathan had discovered a stoppered glass bottle suspended over the edge of the wharf on a length of string. The bottle was filled with yellow water, and contained a small piece of paper with Neurocam branding on one side, and the number "236 405" handwritten on the other.

Whilst this object was being examined and discussed, it emerged that American Guy had discovered something else of interest - a handbag filled mostly with women's clothes (e.g. a short black skirt; some stockings; some cartoonishly old-fashioned, very conservative underwear which, if I recall correctly, included a corset; a pair of circular plastic clotheshangers; a spare, unopened pair of stockings; a small plastic spraybottle, which may have contained deoderant or mouth-freshener; a leather belt; and a cheap shoulder-length red-black wig) in fairly good condition. He had found this object and some other apparently related items under some bushes just outside the designated area.

These items were also examined and discussed. There was uncertainty about their relevance to the assignment. Jonathan, echoing my own thoughts asked, rhetorically: "Is anyone thinking about supermodels?" I was surprised that most of the operatives present didn't seem to understand this as a reference to Shelly Innocence, a figure with several connections to Neurocam, however ambiguous.

Some operatives, including myself, Jonathan, American Guy and Benjamin, went to make further examination of the bushes where the handbag had been found. Draped across the bushes were a sweater and blouse which seemed of a piece with the rest of the clothes, and a single long stiletto boot . (I did not establish whether these items had been found in that location or had been moved there subsequent to discovery.)

I looked inside the boot and systematically unpacked the handbag.

The banal, valueless nature of the items; their discovery outside the designated search area; and the abscence of anything which could be connected with the number in the bottle amongst them, all pointed to the conclusion that they were not what we were looking for.

However I did suspect - and continue to believe - that they were planted for the assignment by Neurocam personnel as a red herring. It was clear by this juncture, if it wasn't before, that the circumstances of the assignment had been set up deliberately by Neurocam and that contrary to the briefing, we were not engaged in a genuine interception exercise.

I moved back into the designated area and went back to exploring the rocks. I encountered Xade, who'd discovered two paper napkins with interesting messages scrawled on them in biro, both dated 28/11/04. He said he'd found them inside plastic bottles amongst the rocks.

One said something like "Max - Hi, how is everyone going. I'm in Australia. Hope you are good." The other said "[illegibly noted name] - Hi, here's a bottle and a bag."

Just as I was wondering whether this meant that maybe the handbag was important after all, excited shouts began issuing from under the bridge to the effect that "it" had been found.

"It" turned out to be a metal briefcase, which had been discovered by Operative Dubya partly concealed inside an opening on the underside of an overhead light support, attached to the furthest pillar under Bolte Bridge, facing the river.

It was unreachable without some kind of elevation. Fortunately, a ladder had been discovered in the area - perhaps near where the bottle was found, I'm unsure. Someone went and got it.

Dubya (I believe) retrieved the briefcase. Two operatives including AliasK applied the number from the paper in the bottle to the combination tumblers and the briefcase was opened to reveal a minidisc recorder.

Everyone gathered excitedly around Dubya as he played the tape. A male voice which identified itself as belonging to Charles Hastings congratulated us on successfully completing the assignment. It also:

- revealed the assignment be a staged "team training exercise";
- instructed all present to acquire a white kabuki mask for use on a future assignment, to be cut away below the upper lip, removing the chin section;
- reminded us to leave the scene as we'd found it.
- instructed Jojo to retain the briefcase, and Bunny to retain the tape player;
- reminded us to submit our reports, and not to publicise information about the assignment for the next 7 days.

Several operatives made their own recordings of the statement whilst it was played, including Ben and AliasK.

General conversation between ops ensued about the contents of the message - which many operatives, including myself, had found difficult to hear - and other details of the assignment. Some ops exchanged web and email addresses.

Someone was dispatched to return the ladder.

At around this point two males probably in their early twenties arrived at the scene. One guy was wearing a Neurocam identifier. The other claimed, upon enquiry, that he had lost his, which made the company slightly hesitant, but it seemed to be generally accepted that they were bona fide operatives, despite an initial sense of communal suspicion that they might be interlopers, or part of some kind of setup. They made comments to the effect of "What did we miss? Presumably everything", to which their were general murmurs of confirmation. Shemjaza asked for their names. The first guy identified himself as "Lord [Something]" and the second said his name was "Kane".

Xade and JoJo were standing at the base of the pillar directly under the lighting support at this juncture; Xade was brandishing the two napkins for the benefit of various operatives who wanted to photograph them. I asked him if I could note down the messages. He gave the napkins to me. I copied out their contents (very illegibly, as it turned out) then handed them back to him.

The assignment complete, and the time approaching 6pm, everyone wandered back up to the end of the wharf and started to disperse. Shem, who'd come by car, asked if anyone wanted a lift anywhere, but no one took him up on it. Walking up the wharf, I asked Ben if he'd be able to send me his audio file of the tape recording. Conversation ensued between us and a number of other ops about the possibility of setting up some kind of online repository for media files generated during the assignment

We noticed a police car passing us in the opposite direction as we walked away from the scene, and wondered if one of the fishermen had reported our weird behaviour.

Assignment NCI-7061/01 (Part 3 - Two More Reports, A Tape Recording, Some Surveillance Footage, And A Question)

2005-02-28T20:20:00.000+11:00

Operatives AliasK and Johana (aka Jojo, as in "Operative Jojo is tasked to secure the briefcase") have posted reports on last Sunday.

Johana's is brief but extremely interesting. She's a dark horse, and her blog is one to watch. (See also this recent post by piking NCI-7061/01 invitee Operative "had to work that day" Tript.)

K's also put up an MP3 of the recorded message from Charles Hastings.

Xade's posted a very interesting piece of media.

And Random Voodoo has a pertinent enquiry, which I second.

Assignment NCI-7061/01 (Part 2 - Briefing)

2005-02-27T22:30:00.000+11:00

Well, the mandatory seven day embargo period is up, so I've decided to post the briefing for Assignment NCI-7061/01, which I received on the 15th, and posted a reference to here the following day.

NCI-7061/01 was, of course, last Sunday's much heralded multiple-operative assignment.

I haven't included the map, but it took place at the end of North Wharf in Melbourne's docklands, under the shadow of Bolte Bridge.

I'm still thinking about what to say regarding what went down. I may post an abridged version of my report, but I filed this right on the dot of Friday's deadline, and haven't received an acknowledgement of it yet from the 'Cam themselves. I'll wait until that happens first. (Li and Random have posted theirs. If anyone spots any more online, do please advise.)

Suffice to say the operation was not what it appeared to be.

NEUROCAM ASSIGNMENT NCI 7061/01 [COUNTER-INTELLIGENCE INTERCEPT]

Area Search and Object Recovery

(A) AIM

The recovery of an object which has been stolen from Neurocam International.

(B) CONTEXT

It has been brought to the attention of Neurocam’s Human Resources Security Division that a disgruntled Neurocam operative has been engaging in corporate espionage. Prior to this individual being identified, several high security rated documents and other company properties were removed from Neurocam’s Melbourne offices.

The operative responsible has been dismissed from the organization, but, despite concerted efforts to the contrary on Neurocam's behalf, to effect his detainment, remains at large.

Intercepted communiqués have revealed that the operative intends to transfer the materials, to persons unknown, via the use of a covert “dead drop” location. Although HR Security personnel have managed to identify the general vicinity where this will occur, the exact location remains unknown.

Neurocam's intelligence reports suggest that the operative will secrete the object at the “dead drop” at approximately 4.30pm on Sunday February 20, 2005. It is also expected that the object will be collected by the alternate party at approximately 6.30pm.

It is critical that the materials are located and recovered without the engagement of the other parties. Ongoing intelligence operations depend on the insurance of the covert nature of this operation until at least seven (7) days after it is completed.

(C) EXECUTION

Below are the procedural details for this assignment. Any deviation from the operational protocol, outlined below, will result in disciplinary action, and likely dismissal of the operative/s from Neurocam International. If there are any doubts about this please contact operations (operations@neurocam.com).

1. At 5pm on Sunday February 20, 2005 you are to arrive at the location detailed in the map provided.

2. Please be aware that you will be met at this location by other Neurocam operatives.

3. Without revealing excessive personal information, you will need to operate as a team to search the area for the materials. You are to begin no earlier than 5.15pm.

4. Neurocam's intelligence reports suggest that it is likely that there will be one object at the location which contains or acts as a key to detecting and/or accessing another secure item, that likely contains Neurocam's proprietary materials. Once you have located and recovered the item use whatever means are necessary to *safely* retrieve the materials.

5. Once the materials are secured you are to vacate the area in an expedient fashion, removing only Neurocam's materials, and leaving the location as close to the condition it was in when you arrived.

6. All operatives are then required to submit a detailed report of their specific involvement in this assignment, and the nature of the events that occur, to the Operations Division (operations@neurocam.com) by close of business Friday February 25, 2005

(D) OPERATIVE OCCUPATIONAL HEALTH AND SAFETY

It is known that part of the search area may be under water so sturdy, waterproof footwear will be required to facilitate a thorough search of the location.

(E) OPERATIONAL SECURITY

Neurocam International is aware that many operatives publicly discuss and relate their Neurocam experiences via online forums and web journals. Operatives are only permitted to disclose the details of this assignment after a period of at least seven (7) days after the successful completion of the assignment has elapsed.

If you have any doubts about what is allowed under this clause, please contact the Operations Division before publication. Please note - due to the deployment of multiple operatives it is essential that all operatives display their Neurocam Identifiers throughout their participation in this assignment. This will enable operatives to verify each others affiliation and limit the potential for infiltration by operatives working against Neurocam International's interests.

(F) TIMELINE

It is essential that Neurocam Operatives do not arrive before 5pm. An early arrival may alert the rogue operative to our intentions.
In addition, to ensure the safety of all operatives, and the viability of continued counter-intelligence operations it is critical that all operatives have vacated the search area by 6:00 PM, prior to the arrival of the alternate parties.

Spycam Profane Entertainment Presents "Traverse" & (un)conchis

2005-02-25T11:15:00.001+11:00

New update at Hely's - it's a mocked-up poster for a movie directed by Hely and starring Robert Henley, amongst others.

UPDATE: "Traverse", as LadyJ helpfully points out here, is the name of a 2003 video work by Hely featuring some of his experimental hidden camera footage.

Elsewhere, in a post speculating on possible links between the 'Cam and Archavida, Q oh-so-casually drops a link to this blog, which details the very colourful Neuro-adventures of a London operative between September & November of last year. The final entry on the 12th promises an update on the 19th, which never appears. Hmm.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a report to finish..

Hely In Arrest Hoax Drama

2005-02-23T19:00:00.000+11:00

Operative Random Voodoo reported yesterday on the dicovery of a Wikipedia entry about Neurocam, which claimed Robin Hely was arrested earlier this month for misappropriating Innocence's Arts Victoria funding to buy Neurocam ads.

I mailed Hely about this. He replied with a categorical denial:

The information at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurocam is complete fabrication. I once assumed Henley's character as an art project I created called "Who is Robert Henley", but have not had any cause to imitate him (if he even exists) since. Peter Burke is a friend of mine and we have collaborated on several projects. I was part of the Innocence team but had nothing to do with the funding of the project, all of which was used solely for Innocence's billboards.

As you probably know I have been a Neurocam operative in the past and even made an art project about Neurocam in NZ. I have been following Neurocam in Australia with much interest and can't wait to hear about the group mission on Sunday. I have been involved in several group assignments myself and know how much fun they can be ... Unfortunately I was dismissed from Neurocam during early 2000 as they did not appreciate my art project which was set up as an expose of Neurocam.

And robinhely.com has been updated with the message: "http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurocam is complete fabrication".

The Wikipedia entry itself has been replaced with the message: "Neurocam' [sic] page removed due to legal procedings".

Thoughts On Discretion & Keeping Neurocam Happy

2005-02-19T13:45:00.000+11:00

Following some interesting inter-operative correspondence this week, I have been thinking about the following clause in the Operative Guide:

"We would prefer that Operatives display a high degree of discretion when relating details of Neurocam’s operational practices."

I have, I suppose, been working on the following assumptions:

Neurocam is essentially a conceptual art project.
It follows that - whatever we're-a-highly-covert-operation shit they spin - its puppetmasters (for want of a better word) are actually seeking to generate as much dialogue as possible, within the limitations explicitly prescribed by assignment briefings.
The silence clauses may or may not exist for good reasons, but they are enforced by threat of expulsion and should be obeyed on that basis, at least.
The employment of other discretionary tactics may be practical, prudent or just good manners - for example, protecting the identity of sources who wish to remain anonymous.
Beyond that, you are playing the game well by being talkative.

What if these assumptions are misguided, though? What if Neurocam really does want operatives to be as discreet as possible?

Hmm. Hmm, hmm.

Hely Speaks and Entrances

2005-02-19T13:20:00.000+11:00

Non-blogging operative Aphex'sTwin sent some enquiries to the Hotmail address which appeared briefly on robinhely.com the other day, and has received the following response:

>A simple enough question, are you or have
>you been involved with Neurocam
>International (http://www.neurocam.com)?

Yes

>Also, if applicable, are you responsible for
>the art piece Project Neurocam, which was
>displayed at the COCA in New Zealand?

Yes. The work was made as a response to my involvement with the organisation known as Neurocam. I became an operative during 1999 and displayed that work in early 2000.

>Furthermore, can you confirm or deny any
>ongoing collaboration with Peter Bourke,
>who also attended the VCA?

Peter and I are not collaborating on any projects at present. Our last collaboration was a work entitled Delivery which was made in Portugal during 2002. By the way I did not attend the VCA, I worked there part time and had an artist in residence position for 2 months.

Robin Hely

On another tack, operatives scratching their heads over Assignment NCI-8063/01 (controversially leaked by a no doubt now ex-operative via Kybalion's neuroboard) might find some inspiration here.

Things Are Getting Interesting On Several Fronts

2005-02-17T22:00:00.000+11:00

But I'm hungry and I've run out of cigarettes. I feel unusual. I think I should go outside.

I want a new and less generic template; can anyone recommend one?

Oh, and robinhely.com has been updated again.

That is all. For the moment.

Assignment NCI-7061/01

2005-02-16T10:45:00.000+11:00

>May I announce the receipt of "a new assignment" and quote its
>codenumber?

That is acceptable.

Neville Harris
Administration
Neurocam International

Neurocam Is Not A Psychology Experiment

2005-02-16T10:30:00.000+11:00

Although of course if it was, they would say that.

This post by Aaron Swartz relating an anecdote about Philip G. Zimbardo put me in mind of Zimbardo's infamous Stanford Prison Experiment of 1971, which has some Neurocamlike qualitites. Zimbardo himself maintains a creepily unrepentant site about this "classic" study of authoritarian and subservient behaviour in a controlled environment, which makes for quite interesting reading, especially in light of various recent scandals.

Elsewhere, "The Perils Of Obedience", an essay by Stanley Milgram, extracted from his 1983 book "Obedience To Authority", reflecting on his almost-but-not-quite-equally notorious experiments:

Before the experiments, I sought predictions about the outcome from various kinds of people ... With remarkable similarity, they predicted that virtually all the subjects would refuse to obey the experimenter. The psychiatrist, specifically, predicted that most subjects would not go beyond 150 volts, when the victim makes his first explicit demand to be freed. They expected that only 4 percent would reach 300 volts, and that only a pathological fringe of about one in a thousand would administer the highest shock on the board.

These predictions were unequivocally wrong. Of the forty subjects in the first experiment, twenty-five obeyed the orders of the experimenter to the end, punishing the victim until they reached the most potent shock available on the generator.

404

2005-02-14T22:25:00.000+11:00

'During the war, when I had a great deal of time to think, and no friends to amuse me, I conceived a new kind of drama. One in which the conventional separation between actors and audience was abolished. In which the conventional scenic geography, the notions of proscenium, stage, auditorium, were completely discarded. In which continuity of performance, either in time or place, was ignored. And in which the action, the narrative was fluid, with only a point of departure and a fixed point of conclusion. Between those points the participants invent their own drama ...

We are all actors here, my friend. None of us is what we really are. We all lie some of the time, and some of us all the time.'

I was able to belatedly complete Assignment NCI-2332 today. Not entirely uncoincidentally, I've started reading some book by John Fowles.

I Heart Xul Solar 23

2005-02-14T11:00:00.000+11:00

..so much that I don't even care who s/he is anymore.

You are the NeuroOp with the midas touch. Keep on spreading that bizarre and confounding misinformation. And that disturbingly legitimate speculation, n'all.

I like you a lot, and I will award you.

Incidentally, as previously linked above, Delta's been getting some interesting replies out of Maxwell Knight:

The organization currently known as Neurocam
has been in existence for in excess of thirty years. The name “Neurocam”, however, was only adopted in 2000.

..which was, of course, the year Robin Hely exhibited his work "Project Neurocam" in NZ.

Googling on Hely just now turned up this PDF, which I haven't seen before. On page 3, Hely writes about developing the hidden camera arrangement presumably also used for "Cherrie":

My intention for this project was to spend as much time as possible over the last 3 weeks recording with the hidden spycamera unit. The process of editing the footage began to suggest the possibility for narratives within what seemed to be exceedingly banal material.

Perhaps it was just my imagination. Exploring combinations of filters, quick cuts and a soundtrack/voice-over made the work into something I found kinda funny. I guess if I had to state this in a more intellectual way I would start wanking on about "explorations of narratives found all around us" and "the banal becoming sublime" and all that crappola, but that's not really my thing...

Young Atom is Anna Schmit

2005-02-12T13:40:00.000+11:00

Or, at a stretch, someone who hacked YA's Blogger account. And, as forcast in a comment on my initial Shmit post by someone using the name Ken Dyers and citing Young Atom's blog as their homepage, a new blog belonging to a certain Xul Solar 23 appeared yesterday, offering a distinctly Shmitsian blend of surrealism, topical Neurosatire and intruige:

I am in contact with operatives who are not part of the Neuroblog community, and who seem to receive assignments of differing calibre to the ones mentioned on the Internet. I will obviously have to take care as to where I step in this regard, as the world of Neurobloggers is one filled with spite and animosity.

Is it? I think we're quite a civilised bunch really.

That said, I should note - lest I find myself being accused of.. I dunno, something - that Xul firmly states:

The allegations that I am in some way involved in the Young Atom / Anna Schmidt prank are completely false.

Welcome to the fold, anyway. Whoever the hell you are.

Schmit in "Not Real" Shock and Neuroboards

2005-02-11T14:00:00.000+11:00

It seems - although I missed it - that after being dissed in comments on her blog by Elmo Oxygen for acting in poor taste, 'Anna Schmit' has retreated back into the realms of fancy from whence she came. Which is a shame. FWIW, I found her two entries entertaining, and although she was milking the not-actually-funny-at-all Rau affair for humour, I think it's being a tad overserious to claim the endeavour was somehow unacceptable on that basis.

(To reiterate: contrary to speculations inspired by our common Blogger template, I had nothing to do with Schmitgate.)

In other news, Kybalion aka Simon Moon and Delta have both created PHP-based Neurodiscussion boards. Kybalion's appears to be the classier setup, but so far Delta's is attracting the most activity.

(QED reports that someone's also started a Neurocam LiveJournal community, but I'm quite literally not even gonna go there.)

Investigating Neurofailure (Part 2)

2005-02-09T08:30:00.000+11:00

I remain skeptical about Fischer's 26% figure, but Cardoza Investigations has closed its case on the Neurocam rejection letter affair. Having interrogated several purported Neurorejectees and received assurances from Human Resources & Security Division Head - and resident operative querymeister - Maxwell Knight, Avery's satisfied that Neurocam does at least occasionally knock back prospectives.

And, In A Surreal Turn Of Events

2005-02-08T20:00:00.000+11:00

The unfortunate Ms Cornelia Rau, having absconded from a New South Wales mental hospital in March of last year, wound up being wrongly imprisoned for 10 months at the Baxter detention centre in South Australia after Queensland police mistook her for an illegal immigrant. She was claiming to be a German woman named Anna Schmit. (ABC - no, not that ABC - coverage here; energetic commentary on this rather apalling fiasco by Xade here.)

What's all this got to do with Neurocam? I'm glad you asked.

It turns out - hot flash! - that 'Anna Schmit' is not, as some might assume, merely a symptom of Rau's chronic schizophrenia, but rather a Neurocam operative who was assigned to take remote psychic possession of Rau's body from a top secret 'Cam facility in Cologne.

You want proof? She's got a blog.

Remember, you heard it here first. (Unless you heard about it from the comment Schmit left at Lady J's.)

Investigating Neurofailure

2005-02-08T19:50:00.000+11:00

Operative Avery "Shamus" Cardoza - having explosively blown the lid off groundless rumours (originating on the Gaia forums and innocently perpetuated by Xade) about Neurocam billboards supposedly sighted in the US - is now investigating the veracity of the unfiction forums-posted Neurocam rejection letter, which as he points out, looks a bit iffy.

Does Neurocam really grant Operative status to only 26% of applicants, as claimed by CEO Bridget Fischer in their standard acceptance letter?

Enquiring minds want to know.

Neurocam Requests The Pleasure

2005-02-07T21:00:00.000+11:00

I was going to keep quiet about this one for the moment but Li's already blown the trumpet on it (along with alias K and an operative called ukelele, in the comments on Tript's followup to his earlier Iocus Severus post), so why not - Hastings has sent out an availabilty call for an as-yet-undisclosed operation "which will require the deployment of multiple operatives" between 5 and 6pm on Sunday the 20th.

I've RSVP'd - looking forward to seeing Li turn up in a stolen pleececar looking as though many of his dreams have been destroyed.

Meanwhile, a Bournemouth (UK) op on the unfiction boards has been assigned to search for potential dead drop locations in their locale.

And later in that same thread - this is a first AFAIK - someone reports failing their initial perception assessment.

My Report For Assignment NCI-2332/01 Has Been Received & Filed

2005-02-05T10:00:00.000+11:00

Email from Mr. Hastings last night.

"Neurocam International appreciates the unorthodox nature of this assignment and your willingness to continue your association with the organization despite this unusual request."

That's awful decent of yiz, Neurocam International.

I will receive the details of my next assignment shortly. Yay!

Curious picture at Li's (something to do with covert training, y'reckon?).

Juicy morsel concerning a meeting with the inscrutiable Iocus Severus at Tript's.

Assignment NCI-2332/01 Not Completed & Miscellaneous Catchups

2005-02-04T11:00:00.000+11:00

Today was my deadline for Assignment NCI-2332/01, but I've only managed to complete 50% of it. I'll submit my report anyway. I'm aware that at least one other op piked on this one, and hasn't been overtly penalised or given their Neuro-marching orders. So we'll see what happens.

The recently established blog of new Melbourne operative Jonathan, who boldly posted a photo (reproduced by LadyJ here) of the Official Neurocam Identifier retrieved by ops participating in Assignment NCI-3001/02, has disappeared. Coincidence? Hmm..

All's quiet on the robinhely.com front for the moment. At the beginning of the week it went yellow and offered, cryptically, "THE SNEAKER PIMP". LadyJ posted a theory that this was a reference to a New Zealand academic called Gareth Schott, whose interests tend towards the Neurocamesque, but robinhely.com quickly updated to "NOT THAT SNEAKER PIMP", before lapsing into the sulky red silence in which it's remained since.

A lot of new ops completed Applicant Perception Assessment NCI-2001/01 on the 31st, including Avery Cardoza, Constance P, Elmo Oxygen, Midnight, and Piankhi. Some of them have posted their reports, too.

Also on the 31st, operative Ophidius emailed the 'Cam with an enquiry about the meaning of the "cam" in "Neurocam", and received a tantalizing reply from Neuroadmin Neville Harris:

The origins and true meaning of the name Neurocam are unknown to all but a select few within the organization. Even level 4 operatives like myself do not have access to any information like that.

He suggested Ophidius try putting the question to CEO Bridget Fischer, which Ophidius did. Ms Fischer was not amused, but she did deign to furnish a response of sorts, however unilluminating:

As you have already, through no fault of your own, wasted a moment of my time, I will address your question – The origins of the name Neurocam are known only to the organization’s founders. Those individuals no longer participate in the day-to-day running of the organization, thus I am unable to provide you with an answer to your question.

It Was All Constance P's Doing

2005-01-30T21:35:00.000+11:00

And now she's come up with some more things Neurocam might be for them to disclaim.

Lord only knows where all this will end.

I'm very much enamoured of EgoTript's description of the 'Cam as "the fucked up leading the hypnotised" (as in "If politics is the blind leading the blind, entertainment is..").

If they deny being that, I'll have to find a new subtitle for this blog and shall be most put out. Just in case anyone thought I was trying to get in on the act.

I think Neurocam is what Discordians refer to as a 'fnord'.

The Cam's Policy: Deny Everything

2005-01-30T11:00:00.000+11:00

In the 90 minutes since my last post, a whole slew of new disclaimers have gone up, many of them dazzlingly surreal; it's starting to look like the inverted results of a Googlism query. (Although Googlism itself doesn't have anything to say about Neurocam, or Robin Hely, or Briele Hansen, it did return quite a few hits for Peter Burke, and a handful for Lisa Andrews. Yeah, I've got too much time on my hands.)

robinhely.com, meanwhile, remains textually unchanged - but the colour scheme has been very slightly diversified.

The Many Faces Of robinhely.com

2005-01-30T09:30:00.000+11:00

What's up with robinhely.com? They're calling it the Daily Neuroclue.

For a while it seemed to have become a kind of informal adjunct to the official Neurodisclaimer.

(Which, incidentally, added a new denial the other day: "Neurocam is not the Ringling Brothers", shortly after operative Li ingeniously deduced, in a comment at Lady J's, that Neurocam is in fact a clown school. Since then, a few more have materialised: the Cam is not influenced by 'the' Thelema, apparently - nor is it a literary awareness program, or a herpes virus, or an initiation process, or...)

Earlier in the week, decked out in arresting blood-red, robinhely.com proclaimed - contrary to some idle speculations - that Lady J is not behind Neurocam, and that she is not operative Briele Hansen.

A few days ago the site changed tack, abandoning its usual "x is not y" format in favour of a single name (on hot pink this time): "LISA ANDREWS". The Lisa Andrews in question appears to be a Sydney-based video artist, who can be tenuously connected to Mr. Hely and Peter Burke via video art showcase Projekt. Discussion at LJ's here, where it's implied by Sydney operative Shemyaza that Ms Andrews is the local "Area Coordinator of Neurocam's Operations" he reports being contacted by here.

And today? Today, in green text cunningly camouflaged by an identical green background, we're told that robinhely.com "IS NOT AN OFFICIAL CAM SITE" and that it "DOES NOT BELONG TO BRIELE HANSEN [its whois listed registrant] OR ROBIN HELY OR NEUROCAM".

No doubt by the time you read this, it'll say something else.

Neurostalking

2005-01-28T18:30:00.000+11:00

With nothing pressing to do this afternoon, and nothing forthcoming from Young "slackarse" Atom about it, I decided to tram it out to Neurocam's supposed HQ on St. Kilda Rd and see what was up.

Nothing spectacular to report - it's a quiet, leafy, three-story complex of 20 apartments, situated directly opposite the Royal Victorian Institute for the Blind, and identified by plaques on either side of the gates to its parking facilities as "The Clivedon".

Online research suggests it's being used for both residential and commercial purposes, but there's no visible signage, apart from an estate agent's board out the front advising that unit no. 15 is to let.

On my way home, I couldn't help noticing that the prominent billboard ad for online employment service seek.com at St Kilda Junction currently advises commuters in fifty foot letters of fire (okay, several foot letters of pastel blue) to "SEEK HAPPINESS". I wonder what Innocence's legal department would have to say about that.

Not that they've got anything to do with Neurocam, if you believe the Cam's recently updated disclaimer page, which claims "Neurocam is not Innocence". (Nor, we're told, is Neurocam "Complicant" - apparently a reference to this - or "anything to do with spiral dynamics". They've also disassociated themselves from Jason Mahling's Splint project, and the manufacture of recreational drugs in the Netherlands - although not the manufacure of recreational drugs anywhere else, which might be significant. Or possibly not.)

Perhaps not uncoincidentally, a plug for Neurocam in the January 8th entry of Shelly Innocence's online journal Shellywood (as in "My sister Kelly came over today and said 'Shelly, you must try Neurocam!'") was replaced at some point over the last week with one for everybody's favourite subcutaneously administered anti-wrinkle toxin botox.

The Cam's disclaimer page has also stated for some time now that Neurocam is not Archavida, apparently in response to Archavida's site pointedly declaring that Archavida is not Neurocam. But someone using the name of notorious (former?) Neuro-associate Robert Henley has registered the domain name www.archavida.org. Meanwhile - as spotted by Mr. Cardoza - Archavida's Harry Smith, using the same contact details, has registered the domain name www.neuocam.org.

Both sites remain vacant at time of writing.

I have completed a fifth of assignment NCI-2332/01 (aka "Operation: Magus"), but I'm bound not to disclose anything about that.

A Technical Query

2005-01-24T20:03:00.000+11:00

It's come to my attention that those viewing Trysting Fields using Internet Explorer have to scroll all the way to the bottom of the page to see the sidebar, for some reason. If anyone has any idea how to fix this, please let me know.

Assignment NCI-2332/01 & a physical address for Neurocam (maybe)

2005-01-23T14:30:00.000+11:00

I've received a new assignment, and I'm not the only one - Xade refers to it here, as - I think - does the geographically far-flung Lady J here.

It has something to do with The Magus.

(I wonder if I should wear my official Neurocam identifier whilst engaged on this one? Hmm. Doing so is an "essential requirement of all future assignments", it says here. So I suppose I shall have to.)

In other news, it appears that neurocam.com's whois entry was updated on the 20th. Previously without any IRL details, it's now registered to an address on St. Kilda Rd under the names Neville Harris (administrative contact) and Ronald Hacknell (technical contact) - the latter using the 'operations' email address generally associated with Charles Hastings.

Young Atom - who, incidentally, appears to have also been tasked with Assigment NCI-2332/01, says in the comments to this post at Lady J's that he's going to go & check it out tomorrow.

Finally, a fantastic post/musing/articulate drunken rant by Avery Cardoza about how best to approach the 'unveiling' that is Neurocam here.

Covert Delivery NCI-3001/02 (Part 2 - Execution)

2005-01-20T23:00:00.000+11:00

Lots of 'Cam related activity this evening - completed my first proper Neuromish, "Covert Delivery NCI-3001/02" between 6 and 7pm, and followed this up by creating my long-contemplated Neuroblog.

I opted to bus it out to the 'secure transfer location' alone (haven't told any of the handful of people I know in Melbourne about my involvement with Neurocam yet. Maybe I should. Hmm). Initially misinterpreting the scale of the provided map, I spent about half an hour wandering around - as inconspicuously as I could manage, naturally - looking for the safe over a much wider area than necessary.

I almost gave up, before twigging to my misunderstanding and sighting what was pretty unmistakeably the 'camouflaged' repository in question. It was nestled in a not-orthodoxly-accessible area, which required some minor clambering to get to, cunningly disguised as a piece of rubbish. It was, impressively, cemented in place.

Inside were somewhere in the region of thirty-odd envelopes - mostly small white ones, and a few slightly larger manilas. All were stamped with the familar "NEUROCAM GET OUT OF YOUR MIND" insignia and had operatives names scrawled on them in biro. Looking through them to find mine, which was one of the manilas, I spotted a few familar names, and a lot of unfamilar ones.

Wondered whether I should be more thorough (count the envelopes, note down the names etc) but having already lingered too long in the region of the site, which was not particularly private, and being aware of the possibility - both from the assignment brief and from another, rather interesting feature of the location (which I'm keeping quiet about until I hear what others have to say about it) - that I was being watched and assessed for my discretion and conformity to proscribed protocol, I simply resecured the safe, pocketed my envelope, and vacated the area.

Opening it up once I got home, as per instructions, I found it contained my "official Neurocam Identifier" - a small red button badge featuring a distinctive glyph of an eye encircled by the letters "N - E - U - R - O - C - A - M" and a form letter on Neurocam letterhead from Bridget Fischer (square brackets = handwritten bits):

Dear Operative [Teigan]

Excellent Work!

You have now completed your first Neurocam assignment.

Combined with the successful completion of Neurocam's application process, you are now awarded full accreditation for operational deployment

As a signifier of your accreditation, you are now permitted to publicly display the official Neurocam identifier (included with this correspondence). This will assist external parties in the identification of the existing relationship between yourself and our organisation. The prominent display, upon your person, of this identifier will also be an essential requirement of all future assignments.

Please be aware that Neurocam International highly prizes its strong corporate image and reputation. Your continued involvement with us is conditional upon the demonstration of a public manner which will in no way reflect poorly upon the organization. Conduct contrary to this condition, such as overt aggression, physical violence, or any similar potentially embarrassing or disruptive behaviour displayed whilst wearing the Neurocam identifier, will result in the immediate termination of your involvement with the organization.

Your operational deployment is effective immediately. To confirm collection of this package, and to initiate the receipt of further assignment detail, please contact Charles Hastings, Head of Neurocam's operations division, and quote the following code - NC [four digits]

Congratulations once again and welcome to the Neurocam team!

Warm Regards,

[signature]

Bridget Fischer
CEO
Asia-Pacific Quadrant
Neurocam International

So I fired off the following to Chuck:

From: Teigan
To: Charles Hastings (Neurocam Operations)
Subject: Completion of Assignment NCI-3001/02 (attn: Charles Hastings)
Date: 20 January 2005 8:21:18 PM

Charles -

As per instructions, I hereby confirm that I have completed NCI-3001/02 (Neurocam Identifier - Covert Delivery) and quote the following code: NC ****.

I look forward to wearing my official Neurocam identifier on future assignments.

- Teigan

And, later in the evening, in the midst of setting up this very blog, received the following response:

To: Teigan
From: Charles Hastings (Neurocam Operations)
Subject: Verification Received
Date: 20 January 2005 9:52:35 PM

Dear Operative Teigan

Verification of assignment completion has been received.

Congratulations and welcome to Neurocam!

Neurocam International’s Operations Division is currently examining the surveillance footage gathered during the completion of your assignment. Your performance will soon be assessed in accordance with operational protocol.

Once that assessment is complete you will be contacted with the details of your next assignment.

Congratulations once again, it’s a pleasure to welcome you to the Neurocam team.

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Neurocam International

My First Assignment: Covert Delivery NCI-3001/02 (Part 1 - Briefing)

2005-01-18T21:00:00.000+11:00

From: Charles Hastings (Neurocam Operations)
To: Teigan
Subject: ASSIGNMENT: NEUROCAM IDENTIFIER
Date: Tue, 18 Jan 2005 22:00:04 +1100

Dear Operative

Welcome to Neurocam!

This correspondence contains the details of your first assignment.

ASSIGNMENT: NEUROCAM IDENTIFIER - COVERT DELIVERY NCI-3001/02

(A) MISSION

The successful covert and secure collection of a standardized "Neurocam Identifier".

(B) EXECUTION

The secure transfer will be executed as follows. Deviation from operational protocol as outlined will result in instant termination of your involvement with Neurocam.

1. Travel to the secure transfer location (refer to map provided).

2. At this location, carefully camouflaged, there is an electronic safe. Using the map provided, locate that safe.

3. Carefully remove the camouflage.

5. Enter code **** and open the safe.

6. Take ONLY the package with your Operative ID written on it.

7. Re-secure the safe.

8. Replace camouflage in such a way as to ensure that Neurocam's property remains unable to be easily located by non-Neurocam personnel.

9. Vacate the area.

10. Once in a secure location, open the package.

(C) TIMELINE

This assignment must be successfully completed by Monday January 31, 2005.

(D) OPERATIONAL SECURITY

The Operations Division appreciates that attendance at a remote locale, based primary on correspondence and data gathered via telecommunications, is known to raise risk profile issues with respect to standard urban environment factors.

To address potential concerns of operational personnel in this instance, permission is granted to invite a person of your choice to accompany while executing the mission. Your judgment in this case is being trusted - and, of course, judged. Should you elect to do so, choose a companion that can be trusted not to disclose to any other party Neurocam's operational protocol and proprietary industrial practices.

Please be aware that, for the purpose of additional security and quality control, you will be monitored throughout the completion of this assignment.

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Asia-Pacific Quadrant
Neurocam International

Welcome to Neurocam!

2005-01-14T21:00:00.001+11:00

Received this today, from Neuro-CEO Bridget Fischer:

From: Bridget Fischer
To: Teigan12
Subject: Welcome to Neurocam!
Date: Fri, 14 Jan 2005 08:25:56 +1100

Dear Operative teigan

Welcome to Neurocam!

I am pleased to advise that I hereby offer you a position within Neurocam International.

Your Perception Assignment report was evaluated in accordance with our pre-determined assessment criteria. Neurocam's Human Resources and Security Division found that your report demonstrated a minimum of seven of the ten qualities desired by Neurocam International. This rating determines that you would be an appropriate candidate for operational deployment.

Neurocam International hopes that you will accept this offer and that this act will mark the beginning of a sustained mutually beneficial association with our organization. Upon acceptance of our offer you will immediately receive accreditation for ongoing operational deployment, a privilege achieved by less than 26% of applicants.

Your operational deployment will be effective immediately, although the details of your first assignment will remain confidential until such time as the Operations Division contacts you. Be aware, the date of your first assignment will be determined by a variety of factors (including, but not limited to, your current location, your age and the state of any current Neurocam operations within your area). Although your deployment is effective immediately, Neurocam can not guarantee the exact date upon which you will receive your first assignment.

Being part of Neurocam is a responsibility we expect you to take very seriously. Neurocam International highly prizes its strong corporate image and reputation, so your continued involvement with us is conditional upon the demonstration of a public manner which will in no way reflect poorly upon the organization. Conduct contrary to this condition, such as overt aggression, physical violence, or any similar potentially embarrassing or disruptive behaviour displayed during the completion of assignments, will result in the immediate termination of your involvement with the organization.

I have included with this letter a copy of one of Neurocam’s introductory brochures - "A brief guide to being a Neurocam operative". It should answer the majority of questions you may have. If, however, you have any further questions, please contact the Head of Neurocam's Human Resources and Security Division, Maxwell Knight (maxwell.knight@neurocam.com), as he will be happy to respond to your queries.

Congratulations on completing Neurocam’s application process. I take great pleasure in being the first to welcome you to the Neurocam team.

A brief guide to being a Neurocam Operative

The Neurocam Operative

There are multiple streams of Neurocam involvement, however the majority of recruits commence their relationship with Neurocam as a Field Operative (or simply 'Operative'). For this reason the following section addresses several frequently asked questions in relation to the practical aspects of becoming, being and retiring from being an Operative.

Operative Life

Recruitment
Recruitment into Neurocam and our organisation is undertaken via a range of methods, both standard and innovative. Operatives are recruited from a range of backgrounds. Each brings to our programme a unique range of skills required by our organisation and together our network of operatives form an indispensable aspect of this endeavor.

Despite repeated speculation otherwise, potential recruits self-select. Following selection they undertake a preliminary assignment while mandatory administrative activities are undertaken. While appropriate verification and positive vetting methods are resource intensive, to date we have been able to obtain information on all operatives adequate to our needs. We have no reason to anticipate any change to this situation.

The Human Resources and Security Division further employs a range of investigative techniques in support of recruitment and vetting processes.

NB: Further information in relation to background checks shall be made available to operatives engaged in Human Resource-related assignments.

Recruit travel and residency

Neurocam International is part of a multifaceted organization with operations throughout the world. We have operatives in countries such as: Australia; New Zealand; the United States of America; Nigeria; Kenya; Japan; Netherlands; Germany and the United Kingdom.
Residence within any single country is not a requisite of continued Neurocam involvement. Recruits may communicate with their contact via their usual channels (where these are available) while traveling. Alternatively, secondary or replacement, arrangements can be negotiated (at the discretion of Neurocam International) to support you during travel, or following relocation.
In extraordinary circumstances, Neurocam may contact you while away from your general residence in relation to its current assignment needs. Participation at such times is voluntary.

Retirement

The Executive of Neurocam International regards any cessation of an Operative's involvement as regrettable; however we accept that this will, on occasion, be unavoidable. Recruits and/or Operatives wishing, for what ever reason, to terminate their involvement need only send an e-mail which expresses this wish. Upon receipt of such an e-mail, all contact with the individual will immediately discontinue. There will be no further correspondence with you.

Assignments

As a recruit you will be placed on assignment. Our requirements are highly varied and recruits are frequently called upon to undertake both diversionary and directly productive assignments. At this point, the exact number and nature of Neurocam assignments must remain confidential, however all applicants who enter the recruitment process will be invited to participate in one, or more, assignments. As recruits progress through initial assessments, and as mandatory administrative processes progress, they may be offered Field Operative status.

Field Operatives are vital to the organisation achieving its aims with the Neurocam programme. Field Operative status ensures your continued inclusion in Neurocam endeavours. The frequency of assignments varies in accordance with programme requirements. In general Operatives are activated once every 20-30 days.

Public Relations/Assignment Security

We do not actively discourage general discussion about Neurocam. We would prefer that Operatives display a high degree of discretion when relating details of Neurocam's operational practices.

Inappropriate disclosure of details pertaining to upcoming assignment(s) that result in the compromise of the assignment(s) can result in disciplinary action.

Participant health and safety

Neurocam International prides itself on its safety record. Unforeseen circumstances not-withstanding, Neurocam attempts at all times to provide operatives with all the information they require to undertake assignments in a safe and secure manner. Operatives are not knowingly sent into situations that pose a significant risk to Operative health or safety. In short, we will never intentionally place our operatives or employees in overly risky or dangerous situations without their prior consent.

NB: Neurocam premises are protected by state-of-the-art security measures, including both passive and active protections.

Contact between operatives

Operatives are not prohibited from entering into correspondence, or other contact, between Operatives during the completion of assignments, or otherwise. Operatives are expected to fully report such correspondence/contact.

Operational intelligence (including media)

Operational intelligence in the form of tangible media, or the electronic means to produce such, relating to an assignment is always both appropriate and welcome unless the Operative is specifically advised otherwise within the assignment brief.

Time zones

Assignment dates and times always refer to an Operative's current time zone upon receipt of the assignment brief.

Failure

The nature of consequence is relative to the nature and cause of non-compliance. The most severe penalty, however, is generally termination of an operative's involvement with Neurocam.

Warm Regards,

Bridget Fischer
CEO
Neurocam International

EgoTript Smelt My Spicy Brains

2005-01-08T21:00:00.000+11:00

Some correspondence with stalwart operative EgoTript today - he put out a general call for Neurocam-related input on the 4th, and I responded with an account of my Neuro-spondence to date. Mentioned that I was thinking about starting a blog, but waiting to see what (if anything) my application yeilded. He said that he thought it was a good idea and that "even if the cam fizzles and fades you write well enough to warrant some exposure". Shucks etc.
Hi Tript, if you're out there.

Applicant Perception Assessment NCI-2001/01 (Part 3 - Report Receipt Verification)

2005-01-07T21:30:00.000+11:00

From: Charles Maxwell (Neurocam Operations)
To: Teigan
Subject: Report Receipt Verification
Date: 7 January 2005 11:56:16 PM

Dear Applicant Teigan

Verification of Perception Assessment NCI-2001/02 completion has been received.

Neurocam International’s Operations Division is currently reviewing your report. Your performance will soon be assessed in accordance with operational criteria. This assessment will complete your application process.

Once our review is complete you will be contacted and informed of the status of your application. Please be aware that this may take between seven to ten working days.

I assure you, however, that Neurocam will be in contact with you again.

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Neurocam International

Applicant Perception Assessment NCI-2001/01 (Part 2 - The Report)

2005-01-07T21:00:00.000+11:00

"Applicant Perception Assessment NCI-2001/01 (Part 2 - The Report)"

From: Teigan
To: Neurocam Operations
Subject: APPLICANT PERCEPTION ASSESSMENT NCI-2001/01
Date: 7 January 2005 3:42:09 PM

So I'm standing at the (lower) tram stop on Fitzroy St. waiting for the No 16 into town, my phone alarm starts bleeping and I realise it's four o'clock. For the purposes of "Applicant Perception Assessment NCI-2001/01" for Neurocam, I'm required to "write a detailed account of everything that happens" between now and 9pm.

(Bemused by the sweeping vaguery of this, I wrote a somewhat smart-arsey email to Neurocam Operations seeking clarification of the directive - for example, what about things occurring between 9pm & 4pm in other timezones? To my surprise I received an ostensibly serious response from one Charles Hastings, Head of Operations, which put me back in my box. "The interpretation of the instructions contained within Neurocam Perception Assessment NCI-2001/02 is entirely at the discretion of the applicant." Okay then. "Everything that happens" means whatever I want it to mean. Easy. For practical purposes, I choose to interpret "things that happen" as being limited to "things I perceive to be happening". But I digress.)

I look around, and of course an infinite number of things are happening out there. It's Monday, but being January 3rd there's a weekendy vibe abroad; loads of people out, the outdoor tables of the cafes and bars and restaurants along Fitzroy St are filled with them, all creating infinite happenings within their own little orbits. Between a mild sense of information overload, abstractly wondering what constitutes "something happening" and pondering the enigmatic nature of Neurocam, I find myself slipping into magical thinking mode. My eyes rest on a half-full waxed paper cup of Pepsi abandoned at my feet, with two straws, and I catch myself wondering what it could be trying to tell me. Or what my brain is trying to tell me by focussing my attention on it. Or something.

The tram pulls up and it's pretty packed - being unable to sit down and read my book, this arbitrary-significance-divining perceptual mode continues. I try to observe the people (a large swarm of asian tourists, spanning the age spectrum; a portly, bent old man in a black baseball cap; a spotty, unconvincingly dressed young man with bad hair standing awkwardly by the doors; a skinny, beaky, angular twentysomething guy with a shaved head in a blue singlet and orange-tinted wraparound sunnies observing him, with what might be pity or contempt. Some teenage girls, all giggles and charm bracelets and SMS-bleeping colourful phones. Mmm teenage girls. No, stop staring) but they don't seem remarkable enough to constitute anything happening.

I look out the window, and it's the numberplates of passing cars which start catching my eye, for whatever reason. We're at some lights on St. Kilda Rd and it's a blue Subaru with a plate that says "SEE 382". Two cars behind it, spookily enough (or not) a red Toyota with "CEE 843". See what, exactly?

Weirdly futuristically-decorated silver van advertising itself as the property of "All Terrier Motives" Pet Care and Grooming service. All Terrier Motives? Oh, okay. Ulterior Motives. Ingenious. Maybe they're a front for Neurocam. Maybe the van is a mobile covert surveillance unit. And the plate? "CFL 643" - yes, good message, be careful. You are thinking like a psychotic person, however idly or casually. Stop it at once. Point taken. Nissan ute behind it: SFE 764. I'm safe now, having pulled myself up short. Phew. And we've reached Flinders St. Station.

A bunch of people get off and I sit down, take out the book I'm reading - "Down & Dirty Pictures: Miramax, Sundance and the Rise of Independent Film" by Peter Biskind - but quickly become irritated at Biskind's incessant personal sniping at Robert Redford under the guise of critiquing his management of the Sundance Institute and end up texting my friend Evan: "Sometimes I question your commitment to Sparkle Motion"; a "Donnie Darko"-derived injoke pertaining to his failure to send me, as promised, the manuscript-in-progress of his new novel. Think about the director Tom DeCillo - quoted, bagging Redford, in the text - for a while. His "Living In Oblivion" with Steve Buscemi as a harried film director struggling against insurmountable obstacles - including a premadonnaish Brad Pitt analogue called 'Chad Palamino' - was a classic.

I am trying to recultivate my interest in film.
I am doing Cinema Studies at Melbourne Uni next year.
That's what this tram ride is about.
I'm going to their Information Centre in Parkville to get myself a copy of the Undergraduate Handbook.

That's what's happening.

I'd called the Info Centre prior to departing, and gotten an 'all our operators are taking other calls' message, suggesting they were open. But they aren't, I discover upon arrival. They're reopening after the Xmas-new year break tomorrow, according to a sign on their door.

The phone rings. It's my mum, calling from Rosedale, on the NSW coast. She informs me that it's a public holiday today, doofus (she herself does not call me 'doofus') and that a pelican has just shat all over the car, but that she & dad are having a lovely time. I wish them my best.

Wander around the campus a bit. It's so pretty. I am going to like studying here, I think.

Sitting on a bench having a cigarette, and a man walks by listening to an iPod - or some other portable audio device with the distinctive white earbuds from an iPod plugged into it. They're very ugly and noticeable a mile away, those white earbuds, hence a poor design from the consumer's standpoint - but a stroke of marketing genius in the sense that they subtly advertise the ubiquity of the iPod to all and sundry. You see them everywhere at the moment. Or at least I do. Maybe that's just coz I want one so badly. Mmm, high capacity portable hard-disk-based digital music players.

Cross back over Swanston St just in time to hop on a tram back to Kilda.

First half of the tramride passes in a haze. The song "Mistaken Identity" by Delta Goodrem, which was playing on Channel V at the gym this morning, has taken up residence in my forebrain and won't dislodge.

Notice a swarm of maybe thirty or forty distinguished looking men in business suits, swaggering like they've just emerged from a long working lunch, up Dorcas (or possibly Coventry) Street and onto St. Kilda Road. But - and here's the thing which makes it out-of-the-ordinary enough to qualify as a 'happening' - their suits are all exactly the same shade of muted peach. They are all wearing the exact same satiny peach-coloured tie. The effect is completely surreal. I look around for cameras. Surely it's a setup of some kind. But there are no cameras. Weird.

*beep! beep!* Ev, quite the surrealist himself, texts me back, epically: "Have u considered a career in sockpuppetry. Analysts predict the market 4 skilled sockpuppeteers will increase exponentially ovr the nxt decade. It's estimated tht by 2025 every home in the industrialised wrld will b fitted w/ a full-featured sockpuppet theatre. Affluent dwellings will hve 2. xxEv"

An unkempt, depressingly young woman gets on at St Kilda Junction and starts chatting happily away to herself about how various major world leaders are actually robots, and the Port Philip City Council is secretly a paedophile ring, merely milking the whole 'local government' schtick to lend itself a veneer of respectability. Everyone else on the tram studiously creates this weird psychic deadzone around her, rendering the atmosphere much stranger than her strange behaviour alone would have done. Not wanting to conspire in this alienating treatment, I briefly make eye contact, which she seems to like. Then I realise I could easily wind up in the deeply undesirable position of becoming a replacement for the apparently imaginary person she's currently talking to. Quickly cut away, falling regretfully into line with the other not-overtly-insane passengers on the tram completely ignoring her. This situation reminds me of living in London in 1999.

Reflect on how differently people who live in teeming metropoli - as opposed to rural hamlets like Canberra - relate to each other as strangers in public spaces.

Dismount back on Fitzroy, cross the road, head up the street. Still lots of people out. Hit by a sudden pang of loneliness passing the Prince of Wales. Turn the corner onto the Esplanade. Stop for a cigga, looking wistfully out to sea. Feel glad that - whatever else may be lacking in my life - I do at least live in a beautiful place.

Synchronistically, just as I'm feeling all self-piteous and angstridden, who should call but Canberra's answer to Marla "I've just swallowed a bottle of Xanax" Singer, JF. She's in conniptions about whether or not she should move back into her parents place, since the rigours of living on her own are just too much for her. "I just lack the basic living skills necessary to sustain myself independently!" she whines. Gently suggest that perhaps she could maybe, like, try and learn them. "Oh, I hate learning things. *audible pout*"

Find myself becoming increasingly irritated at her flakiness and start lapsing into flippancy and sarcasm, which she is too self-absorbed to detect, irritating me even further. Her myriad 'problems' are all entirely self-generated and she has no real interest in resolving them, because that would deprive her of her only significant preoccupation in life, leaving her with nothing to talk about except her tedious accountancy job which she hates. I've known toasters with more self-awareness than this woman.

I start to make "well, gotta go" sorts of noises but these make no impact either since she is experiencing a Major Emotional Crisis and it's inconceivable that I could possibly have anything better to do than listen to her piss and moan interminably for the remainder of the afternoon.

After about forty minutes, the conversation finally ends like this:
Her: "Look, I'm *sorry* if my problems are difficult or unpleasant for you to hear about, but I --"
Me: "J, it's not that they're difficult and unpleasant to hear about, it's just boring. Okay? They're boring. Goodbye." (Click.)

Go into Coles on Acland St., wondering vaguely if I have been unconscionably horrible. Ultimately decide I haven't. Brutally honest, certainly - but, I rationalise, when someone's lost perspective to the extent that she unquestionably has, to be brutally honest is doing them a favour. Cruel, kind, etcetera. Buy cheese, bananas, tuna, pasta sauce (complete with a tag around its neck: "Try new Dolmio pizza topping's" - tsk), toilet cistern disinfectant pellets, corn, bread, ciggas.

Go home. Pass the quiet middleaged bald man (Darren? Daryl?) who lives down the corridor with his six year old daughter (Sophie?) on my way in. She is eating a strawberry paddlepop. I say hi. He says hi. She says hi.

Unpack my shopping. Install one of my new toilet cistern pellets and take a shit. Make a sandwich. Switch on the 'puter and start writing up this account. Switch on the news, so that I can at least make some reference to things which have happened outside of my own personal sensory sphere.

The first ten minutes are tsunami-fallout coverage. Since the disaster itself occurred days ago I decide this material doesn't qualify as pertaining to anything that's happened this afternoon.

In other news, four people have drowned at Warnabool bay. One family lost loved ones from three generations. Grabs of a visibly distressed woman in sunglasses talking about this. The Bakhtiyaris have arrived in Pakistan. Vanstone intends to bill them for at least a third of the $3 million in legal fees, detainment and deportation costs they've 'incurred' during their Australian jaunt, the stingy bitch. In finance, the relative values of various international currencies have fluctuated yet again. Sport. Cricket. Tennis. More tennis. Blah. Weather: it was a mostly sunny day around the state today. Allegedly. But not here in Melbourne, I can attest - it's been pleasantly warm but equally pleasantly cloudy.

Does the weather constitute something which is happening? It's notoriously the thing you talk about when you haven't got anything more happening to talk about, so perhaps not.

An eye for semantics is a trait highly valued by the management of Neurocam International, apparently. So perhaps my best bet is to emphasise my eye for semantics in this account, rather than my eye for what's actually going on around me - which is rolled back into my head most of the time, lending me a disconcerting, zombielike appearance that frequently causes sensitively disposed types to run away screaming in terror when they see me coming up the street. No, really.

7:30 Report. More ghastly tsunami tragededom, inevitably. The news media's apparent difficulty in covering a story so large-scale - both geographically and in terms of its practical and human impacts - is interesting, and - at a stretch - comparable to the challenge facing those attempting Perception Assessment NCI-2001/02. At least, those poor souls who weren't privy to the 'interpret at your discretion' caveat I was lucky-slash-intrepid enough to discover.

Everything that happens. Everything that happens. It's deliberately vague, of course. It doesn't say "everything that happens to YOU" for a reason. It's inviting broad interpretation. This pontification counts as valid content because it's happening right now, in my brain and on my keyboard, and it's 8pm.

Good evening, thanks for joining us.

My attention has just been caught by the trailer on the teev for the first ep of a documentary series called "Altered Statesmen" (tonight: the inside story of Ronald Reagan's cognitive decline subsequent to being shot by John Hinckley in 1981) which appeals. But it's on at 8:30 and X is semi-expecting me at his place in ** at 9:30ish, which I'm not a hundred percent sure I know how to get to, so I should probably be en route by then.

I wonder whether I should eat something, or get some food on the way, or whether we'll end up going out for KFC or some such later in the evening. This latter seems a likely scenario.

Hmm.

Fuck it, I had a sandwich.

Don't even know if I want to go really. Maybe I'll just stay in and continue reading my copy of VicRoads Publication Number 00568/6 "Road To Solo Driving" ("Learning to Drive - Driving to Learn" - odd choice of subtitle for a manual aimed at pre-"L"-platers).

Postscript: I ended up staying in and watching the doco, which was quite interesting. Nothing else happened.

ATTACHED:

worst.jpg - Still from David Fincher's "Fight Club" (1999) depicting Helena Bonham-Carter as Marla Singer and Edward Norton as "Jack", juxtaposed with a promotional shot of a Nokia 6610 mobile telephone, representing my horrible conversation with JF the psychic vampire, the worst thing that happened today.

best.jpg - Notably nondescript found photo purportedly of St. Kilda beach, representing a brief and somewhat empty moment of vague contentment I experienced whilst looking out over said beach, the best thing that happened today.

Applicant Perception Assessment NCI-2001/01 (Part 1 - The Day In Question)

2005-01-03T21:00:00.000+11:00

This was the day upon which, for the purposes of "Applicant Perception Assessment NCI-2001/01", I and my contemporary Neurocam registrees were required to "document everything that happens between 4pm and 9pm". I did this, completing my report and submitting it on the deadline day, Friday 7th.

New Year, New Blog

2005-01-01T21:00:00.000+11:00

Good evening. The primary purpose of this blog is to document my involvement with the enigmatic organisation known as Neurocam. I don't know exactly what Neurocam is (here's a list of things they purport not to be) but whatever its underlying purpose - if there is one - there's some indication that the 'Cam wants its operatives to keep blogs, detailing any relevant activities and thoughts.

So here's mine. Hello.

I've been sniffing round what fellow new recruit - and Neuro-theoretician nonpareil - Lady J refers to as 'the Neurocam hole' for almost exactly a month now, so some quick 'n' dirty initial catchup is in order. (Despite the date tag, I'm actually writing this on the 20th of January.)

Neurocam first penetrated my consciousness via this Metafilter thread of December 18, which links to this article (free registration required) from that day's edition of Melbourne's premier daily broadsheet The Age.

I was inclined, like this Metafilter poster, to call 'bullcrap art project' on the whole thing, but my curiosity was piqued nonetheless. As bullcrap art projects go, this was a singularly labyrinthine and intruiging one.

The Age article pointed to Neurocam's official website, a couple of amorphously related other sites (including Shelly Innocence and Who is Robert Henley?), and the blogs of a few established Neurocam operatives, notably Graham Henstock (now retired) and EgoTript. I read, was fascinated, but remained uncertain about whether or not I actually wanted to get involved.

But I couldn't stop thinking about it. I poured over Neuro-discusions on various fora (such as 23rdian and "alternate reality gaming" board unfiction), and scoured a few other operatives' blogs: Xade, HamishJ and Q (who is not technically an operative but who Knows Something), as well as pages about other projects by apparent Neurocam 'puppetmasters' Peter Burke & Robin Hely.

Finally, on December the 19th, I took the plunge and filled in the online registration form.

A few hours later, I received the following autogenerated response:

From: Neurocam Enquiries
Reply-To: Maxwell Knight
To: Teigan
Subject: Your Neurocam Application
Date: Sun, 19 Dec 2004 19:20:24 +1100

Dear Applicant

Thank you for expressing interest in Neurocam.

Your application has been forwarded to a designated officer within the Human Resources Security Division so that our organization can further evaluate your suitability for recruitment.

In the interest of facilitating an expedient assessment, the Human Resources Security Division is currently implementing a series of background checks. We apologize in advance for the potentially intrusive nature of these checks and assure you that Neurocam International only undertakes this course of action in the interest of protecting our propriety operational procedures. Any information gathered from this historical evaluation will be treated as strictly confidential.

If your application is successful you will be contacted by Mr. Charles Hastings, Head of Neurocam International's Operations Division. Mr. Hastings will further inform you about the nature of the tasks Neurocam requires you to complete.

An unsuccessful application will result in the cessation of all further correspondence between Neurocam and yourself.

Neurocam appreciates that in 83.6% of instances, new applicants experience a desire to enquire about many issues which may further enlighten them as to the true nature of Neurocam. Due to the need to maintain a high level of operational security Neurocam is unable to provide much of the information desired by entry level participants.

We can, however, inform you of the following - Neurocam is a process which you are already part of.

Having said this, if you do have any questions, please feel free to contact me directly. I will endeavor to answer as many of your enquiries as Neurocam's Organizational Security Guidelines allow.

Thank you once again for expressing interest in Neurocam. I hope that your application will be successful and that I will soon have the pleasure of working with you.

Warm Regards,

Maxwell Knight
Head, Human Resources Security Division
Neurocam International

Three days later, on the 22nd - my 'sec check' presumably complete - I received another:

From: Neurocam Enquiries
Reply-To: Neurocam Operations
To: Teigan
Subject: Completion of Neurocam Application Process.
Date: Wed, 22 Dec 2004 23:26:31 +1100

Dear Applicant

To conclude Neurocam's application process ALL APPLICANTS are required to complete the following questionnaire and perception-based assessment.

An assessment of the applicant's suitability for operational deployment will be made following the fulfillment of these non-negotiable pre-requisites.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

NEUROCAM QUESTIONAIRE - NCI-1001/02

1. How did you hear about Neurocam?
2. What are your expectations of Neurocam?
3. What is your lucky number?
4. Do you instinctively turn left or right?
5. Complete this sentence - "Neurocam is."

END NEUROCAM QUESTIONAIRE - NCI-1001/02

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

APPLICANT PERCEPTION ASSESSMENT NCI-2001/01

(A) MISSION.

Assess applicant's perception abilities.

(B) EXECUTION.

1. Write a detailed account of everything that happens between 4pm and 9pm on Monday January 3, 2005. Pay particular attention to any occurrence which may be deemed "out of the ordinary". Include in your account two images that represent the best and worst things that happen on Monday 3, 2005.

2. Submit this report via email to operations@neurocam.com by close of business Friday January 7, 2005.

(C) OPERATIONAL SECURITY.

Not Applicable.

(D) GUIDELINES.

As with all Neurocam assignments, you will be assessed on the manner in which you complete this assignment.

Intelligence and creativity are traits highly valued by Neurocam and a demonstration of both of these will expedite your further advancement within the organization. Your application and aptitude in this assignment will be the basis for consideration for operational integration.

ENDS APPLICANT PERCEPTION ASSESSMENT NCI-2001/01

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Neurocam International

My beloved little sister arrived in town for Christmas on December 24th. She'd never heard of Neurocam, but she was reading The Magus by John Fowles, a book pointedly namechecked by masked Neuro-representative 'Neville Harris' in the Age article. I took it as an omen.

On new years' day, I answered the questionnaire:

From: Teigan
To: Neurocam Operations
Subject: Re: Completion of Neurocam Application Process.
Date: 1 January 2005 3:03:14 PM

NEUROCAM QUESTIONAIRE - NCI-1001/02

1. How did you hear about Neurocam?

From Marc Moncrief's Dec 18 article in The Age, via metafilter.com.

2. What are your expectations of Neurocam?

I have no concrete expectations. The Age article was intriguing, and had me chasing down myriad online trails trying to get a better handle on the whole thing, which was entertaining and intrigued me even more.

Given the substantial number of new signups one presumes Neurocam has received recently, I reckon it's unlikely I'll be selected as an operative. If I am, maybe the assignments will help add some colour to my currently rather lacklustre existence. Maybe I'll be kidnapped and horribly tortured by ruthless sociopaths, which would make for an entertaining dinner party anecdote or two. Maybe my involvement with Neurocam will help me to gain greater self-knowledge, and ultimately
crack the baffling puzzlebox of my own tortured psyche. Maybe it'll drive me hopelessly insane.

Perhaps I will discover that time, the self, physical matter, and everything else that goes into making up this shallow world of forms in which we all naively "believe" "we" "live" is nothing but an illusion, engineered by intelligent machines as a power source. Woah.

Perhaps not.

Who knows?

3. What is your lucky number?

Until recently I'd have said 27, but for now I don't have one.

4. Do you instinctively turn left or right?

Left. I think. No, right. Maybe. Depends on what's triggered my instinctive turning reflex, and why.

5. Complete this sentence - "Neurocam is."

.. asking me questions.
.. an immersive, interactive, theatrical art project / largescale public headfuck / prank masquerading as something darker and more sinister than it really is.
.. bizarrely well-funded for an organisation with no obvious revenue stream.
.. none of the above.
.. not what I think it is.
.. a proper noun with no known referent.

"Neurocam is." is not a sentence. Or is it?

1. Write a detailed account of everything that happens between 4pm and 9pm on Monday January 3, 2005.

*Everything* that happens? Does this include things that happen in other timezones? If so, should the account refer to everything occurring between 4pm and 9pm in those locales, or in mine?

Happy new year.

- T

.. and received the following reply from Operations Division head Charles Hastings within the hour:

To: Teigan
From: Neurocam Operations
Subject: Re: Completion of Neurocam Application Process.
Date: 1 January 2005 3:56:09 PM

Dear Applicant Teigan

An eye for semantics is trait highly valued by the management of Neurocam International. You are quite correct in your supposition that the act of detailing "everything" that happens between 4pm and 9pm would be remarkably difficult.

Does this mean that we intend for you to document events which only occur in your immediate vicinity? Unfortunately this is a question I am not permitted to answer.

The interpretation of the instructions contained within Neurocam Perception Assessment NCI-2001/02 is entirely at the discretion of the applicant. The manner in which you choose to apply that interpretation will further allow Neurocam International to assess your suitability for operational deployment.

In response to your query about time zones - Neurocam International would prefer that you complete the assessment during 4pm and 9pm of the time zone in which you are physically present during that period.

Regards,

Charles Hastings
Head, Operations Division
Neurocam International

The game was afoot.